Day-Storms Studio

If I had to bid adieu to one over-used word I (like many others) use regularly, it would be “but.” Now, let’s get one thing straight. I’m not abandoning it as a simple conjunction. No, I would like to give it up as an EXCUSE. You see, “but” has been my trusty sidekick whenever I wanted to dodge responsibility or avoid a task.

“I’d love to go to the gym, but I’m tired.”

“I’d eat healthier, but pizza exists.”

“I’d go see that latest rom-com with you, but the Mizzou-Florida game starts soon.” [Okay, for that one, “but” is necessary!]

But let’s dive deeper. The word “but” is more than just a conjunction or an excuse. It’s a reflection of our inner conflicts and hesitations. Every time we use “but” as an excuse, we’re revealing a part of ourselves that’s uncertain, hesitant, or resistant to change. It’s a window into our psyche, showing our internal struggles and the battles we fight every day.

For instance, when I say, “I’d love to travel, but I don’t have the money,” what I’m really saying is, “I value the experience of travel, but I’m also concerned about my financial stability.” It’s a clash of desires and fears, hopes and realities.

Now, let’s talk about my sons, Spider-Man* (age 6) and Bonecrusher* (age 4). Oh, how they’ve mastered the art of the “but”! Every time I ask them to clean their rooms, it’s always, “But Dad,…!” or when there’s a squabble between them, “But he started it!” I can’t help but chuckle at their innocent attempts to use “but” as their get-out-of-jail-free card.

My sons, with their innocent “but Dad” retorts, are also expressing their own conflicts. “But Dad, he won’t let me play!” translates to, “I value my playtime and the joy it brings, but my brother and I lack adequate communication and conflict negotiation skills.” It’s a delicate balance of self-interest, empathy, and patience.

In essence, giving up “but” is not just about eliminating an excuse. It’s about confronting our inner conflicts head-on, understanding our priorities, and making conscious decisions. It’s about taking control of our lives, one word at a time.

So, the next time you catch yourself using “but” as an excuse, pause and reflect. What are you really trying to say? What internal conflict are you grappling with? And most importantly, how can you resolve it?

So, while “but” may be a small word, it carries more weight that what we should give it. By giving it up, we’re not just improving our vocabulary; we’re improving ourselves. And that’s a change worth making.

So, here’s to a life without “but” excuses. Who knows? Maybe I’ll finally hit the gym or perhaps my sons will miraculously clean their wrestle room (their version of a man-cave) without a month-long gap. One can only hope!